The Customer Service Survey
VocaLabs' weblog providing news and commentary on the challenges of providing good customer service.
Pirate Tech Support
Friday - September 19, 2008 10:33 AM in
by Peter Leppik
In honor of today, International Talk Like a Pirate Day, I humbly present Pirate Tech Support. Best read in a growling pirate voice:
CSR: Arrr! This be pirate tech support, matey, my name be Gimpy Pete. What be yer problem?
CUSTOMER: Ahoy, Gimpy Pete, I be havin' trouble shiverin' me timbers.
CSR: Kent shiver ye timbers? Arrr! That be a problem, matey, ye could be feedin' the sharks. Ye got yer product serial number?
CUSTOMER: I don' got me no serial number, me be a pirate! Arrr!
CSR: That be good, let's be workin' the problem. Ye battoned the hatches?
CUSTOMER: Arrr!
CSR: Ye trimmed the mainsail?
CUSTOMER: Arrr!
CSR: Ye swabbed the poopdeck?
CUSTOMER: Arrr, we be bloodthirsty pirates here, there be no deck swabbin' on these worm-eaten planks!
CSR: Ye be right, I just be checkin'. I need ye to be goin' to Davey Jones' Locker, tell me when ye there.
CUSTOMER: I be there.
CSR: Now ye be openin' the locker.
CUSTOMER: It be open.
CSR: Now ye be shakn' the chains in Davey Jones' Locker.
CUSTOMER: I be shakin' the chains. Arrr! Me timbers is shiverin' agin!
CSR: Thank ye fer' callin', an' don' ferget to take the survey, or I'll make ye walk the plank.
CUSTOMER: Arrr!
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